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Do you struggle setting boundaries with haunted dolls? Are you coping with unwanted toy affection? Is your dangerous imagination unleashing hoards of body-snatching 80s collectibles on your town?
I can help!
Toy Killing isn’t easy, especially when you’re busy winning contests, building businesses and sucking up to rich girls. Luckily, you have, me–Cozy Stern, twelve-year-old toy-killing expert and bad guy, to guide you. By following just a few extremely dangerous steps, you’ll learn to handle wacky toy ladies, dodge boy band dolls, wrangle wild couch cushion forts and knock out evil thrift store horrors with class and sass.
Let my friends, Freda the toy freak, Quazar the robot, Justin the hot mailman, and a lot of rage-filled plastic lambs, save you both time and body parts with our method, presented in a fast-paced mayhem-filled manual specifically designed with you in mind. And the best part is, you might just live through your own personal toypocalypse!
Pick up your FREE copy of HOW TO BE A TWEEN TOY KILLER today, after all, they are coming for you.